My Best Self 101 Blog
So how does this apply to us—individuals who may or may not be Buddhist, but who are all trying to fill our lives with a little more happiness? Well, if we accept the concept is true, then we recognize that we have no real control of most events in our lives. Just like the waves of the ocean, opportunities and challenges ebb and flow on their own time frame.
For most people, making huge changes to our lives is either not feasible or we don’t really have one big thing that’s dragging us down and keeping us from being happy. More likely than not, it’s a bunch of smaller things in your life, or things that you yourself are doing or aren’t doing, that’s holding you back from feeling truly happy.
Interestingly, it has become pretty normal—even trendy—to avoid potentially uncomfortable interactions/conversations with strangers. There are plenty of internet memes and TikToks joking about avoiding people you don’t know in public spaces. Our society has begun to limit the opportunities for small human interactions, and it’s not just because of COVID-19 social distancing guidelines.
Considering what we know about the importance of supportive relationships to health and happiness, Gottman’s research on couple relationships is gold. We know, on average, that married people are more healthy both physically and mentally. In fact, a person’s romantic relationship affects their health just as much as diet and exercise.
Between pandemic updates and politics, I've found myself brain-fogged and on edge more than I care to admit. Instead of living in the present, I've let my mind get carried away with doomscrolling and imagining every possible worst-case scenario. It's not healthy to spend all of your cognitive energy trying to understand something that can't be understood. But how do you go from doom and gloom to savoring life again when there's just so much to worry about?
Put simply, self-efficacy is the amount of belief that you have in your own capabilities. Whether it be public speaking, making a friend, or creating a business, we instinctively set goals to seek personal growth. We cannot attain these goals without believing in ourselves. Sure, it may seem cliché. You’ve heard “believe in yourself,” “be confident,” and “trust in yourself” predictably plastered into your perceptive field, right? Even so, we need such confidence now more than ever.
