well-being

Grief: A Year Later

Grief: A Year Later

A year has passed since my hero died.

I bought a car. I got promoted. I married the love of my life. I started psychotherapy and switched therapists. I got a cat. I suffered a bad ear infection.

In all the things—the mundane and the extraordinary—I missed my brother. He wasn’t in the passenger seat with me in my new corolla, singing like nobody was listening. He never called and congratulated me on my new position at work. There was an empty chair for him at my wedding, one covered in yellow roses for him, but that no amount of beauty could fill. My ear hurt more from not hearing his voice than from the bacteria inflaming it.

The Life Cycle of a Leaf

The Life Cycle of a Leaf

Recently, as I sat under the marvelous tree behind my apartment, I thought about its full, summer emerald leaves, now matured into vibrant crimson reds. These leaves were once buds in spring, working as self-sufficient producers in summer and quietly shifting into vibrant arrays of ruby in autumn. I pondered the seasons of my own life as the tree behind my house entered its own preparation for change, with those beautiful leaves preparing for winter by falling to the ground. What might the life cycle of a leaf help us notice about our own relationship with change? 

From Dropout to Doctorate

From Dropout to Doctorate

To say my freshman year of college was rough is an understatement. A mix of—too many things to share in a blog post—made adapting to daily living and completing assignments difficult. I was so exhausted following that first year, that I only lasted three days of sophomore year before dropping out. So, I left college. And, it was arguably one of the best things to ever happen to me.  

Impermanence and Living in the Present Moment

Impermanence and Living in the Present Moment

You’ve probably heard the saying (or some variation of it), “the only thing constant in life is change.” The older I get, the more I encounter the truth – and the occasional mixed bag of feelings – that these words hold. Change is constant, and life is constantly changing, but my natural tendency is to resist and feel a general sense of anxiety when inevitable changes occur. And I am probably not alone in this. Zen master and teacher Thich Nhat Hanh (2012) speaks to this tendency toward discomfort and resistance, explaining that we humans often come from the mindset that things are supposed to stay the same. However, he points out that when we resist change rather than accept it, we bring about added suffering. The antidote? Instead of resisting change, lean into it, embrace it.  

The Power of Compassion

The Power of Compassion

Have you ever witnessed someone, even a stranger, having a difficult time and felt as though you should help them in some way? Our website defines this feeling as compassion; in other words, it is “the emotional experience of seeing another's suffering and being moved to try to alleviate that suffering.” Unfortunately, we do not need to look far to find human suffering. At the same time, there are many profound examples in the world of how another’s compassion can meet this suffering. 

The Creative Remedy: Why Expressive Acts are Essential for Mental Health

The Creative Remedy: Why Expressive Acts are Essential for Mental Health

What is creativity? The American Psychological Association defines creativity as “the ability to produce or develop original work, theories, techniques, or thoughts” (APA Dictionary of Psychology, n.d., para. 1). Like me, you may have favorite creations that others have made, such as a piece of music or a painting. It may seem natural to applaud new discoveries or beautiful works of art creative people have made, because they benefit us or enrich our lives in some way. My grandfather was one of the most creative people I knew. He seemed to be able to make just about anything with his hands, whether it was a welded music stand, a wooden jewelry container, a silly face carved out of a golf ball, or a thoughtful note written in calligraphy. My grandfather’s creations brought wonder and joy into my life, and he gave many of these creations away to me and other family members as personalized gifts. This is just one example of how the creativity of one person can influence another for good.  

The Universe Smiles Upon You When You Feel Safe in Your Skin

The Universe Smiles Upon You When You Feel Safe in Your Skin

We've all heard the romantic sayings: "We just fit together" or "We're like two peas in a pod." Last Halloween, I saw a couple dressed as peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, sitting on top of each other at the library. Sweet, right?

Recently, I was struggling to fit a lid onto a plastic container, growing increasingly frustrated with each failed attempt—only to realize I was using the wrong lid entirely. It struck me: this is exactly how we think about romantic relationships. We believe there's someone out there who's meant to fit us perfectly, like two puzzle pieces clicking together to form a complete, perfect square.

But here's the thing: it's never that simple.

Grief & Mindfulness: The Research

Grief & Mindfulness: The Research

It was the last day of classes for the semester, and I was heading home, exhausted. 

The semester had been the longest of my life. Tragedy struck—my dear older brother took his life just as my routine was setting in, and my life fell apart. I had to quickly pick it up again because midterms were around the corner, and my many responsibilities would not wait for me to get my act together. Now, with my final class done, I could breathe again. 

The Joy of Fewer Choices: Lessons from Life and Research

The Joy of Fewer Choices: Lessons from Life and Research

The freedom to choose is one of humanity’s most cherished gifts, woven into our very souls. It is defended by constitutions, psychologists, and even toddlers as a basic human need. Yet an endless buffet of choices is neither required nor always beneficial for exercising agency and promoting self-determination. In fact, too many options can decrease life satisfaction and lead to decision paralysis (Scheibehenne et al., 2010). I have personally experienced this.